Stitches

This could not be more perfect right now.  I want to cry everyday and am so grateful for the things that I do have in my life. 

I have been waiting on an appointment for some time and I got an email saying

I have not forgotten about you.

And that of coarse made me cry.

The other day,   she said to me I am so glad you are here, I don't think I tell you that often enough.

And my heart smiled. I matter.

This weekend an amazing group of women, filled a food pantry and I got to help. 

Such an experience. I found a piece of PEACE.

It was so awesome.  But the last few moments with momma`were the best.   

She stood there her hand on her heart and said" I don't think I want to go in there and see"

I asked her why, putting my hand on my shoulder, and she mentioned with her fingers down her face 

that she would cry. And tears began to fill her eyes.

 And my tears began, the kind that just come and I told her that it was ok.

She went on to say what a blessing it was, that she asked for what she needed and she got it.

I don't have a faith like that

life has often not been kind for me but I am most grateful for the things I have, the great kindnesses

that I have right this moment in my life.

Thanksgiving is right around the corner.

I am trying to balance the sadnesses and the blessings.

Of being invited for dinner and football and dancing with the Wii , with

kind kind kind kind kind people 

to not being welcomed or wanted by people who call themseves family

yes a very confusing time.

So many blessings, So many sadnesses, but yet more blessing.

There is not one thing I can change about right now.

I will be most grateful for each kindnesss.

 

I can be thankful for that.