Nothing to forgive just the way I am

I keep hearing this line in a song, and I smile. 

There is nothing to forgive its just the way that we are. 

That so much that. 

 I am who I am and that is just the way that it is.  I have been told my entire life to be something different.  To act different. I do things in a different way.  In way too many situations who I was was not accepted or valued. I have been told to fake it until I make it, but that isn't me.  I am quiet until I know you.  I will sit back and watch until I am comfortable.  I talk when I have something to say not to hear myself talk.  I have been told to ask for forgiveness for just being me and that is not ok. The way that I am is not acceptable to so many people and I have been told to change, and do things different.  I don't want to do things different.  Who I am is not something that I need to change into something else.  I am quiet, that is me.  My heart has been deeply hurt and there are things that I am always going to do.  There are going to be times, when I get quiet and just need my alone time.  Nothing wrong with that and I should not have to apologize.      

I have had to apologize for who I am my entire life, I have been told to fake it until I make it, I have been told that my thoughts and feelings were wrong.  I have been dismissed and judged my entire life no matter what I have done. My thoughts decisions and way of being has been dismissed and excluded.  I am weird i know that, I watch and I do things different but that isn't a bad thing, its nothing to change, it;s just part of me. 

I do not need to ask for your forgiveness because you can't understand this soft, gentle heart of mine.  I do not need your opinion.  I am not going to fake it until I make it because that just isn't who I am, or what I want  . I will not pretend to believe in something that has not been there for me.