Sometimes the tree sometimes the leaves

Lately it seems I am the leaves

Sometimes the tree more often lately the leaves.

The flowing flitting, falling leaves 

I haven't been sharing much and writing for myself. I feel often alone in this and people that used to be forever seem so very far away .  

I feel like I am forever chasing forever and each time I am heartbroken 

and yet I keep trying.  When Will I learn. 

Part of it is the things I never learned when I was little that today I can never get 

those life long friends, those forever things, those that always have your back. 

I have some of that today and I am grateful, its just that forever part.

I don't feel like that strong, that able that brave.

It's the time of year to be happy and Jolly, and I am trying with everything that I am.  

I feel like the leaves blowing around not being important really, not really being something that 

Matters.

  Worth, yea there that is again. 

Yea, I want forever and think that's too much to ask

But I keep asking keep chasing and like a leaf fall where I may.

I don't want to be a leaf, I want to have roots, I want to belong, I want to be important.

I want to be the tree that is brave and strong, and flows with the wind, knowing where it belongs 

Having a true place , understanding the ups and down 

understanding which way the wind blows but knowing your feet are firmly planted

its got to be me, but what do I do ? 

 I know that I am different and see things different I am quarky and weird but that is me

that is so me 

there are things in me that I am not willing to change to make others happy

there has got to be people out there to understand that 

to appreciate that to be on my side all the time 

I am frustrated that not one person cared to ask me what happened, not one person cared to ask about my feelings but were more than open to telling me hers 

So much stems from this 

I give my all to people and just want the same 

Stick up for me, talk to me, believe me 

Hear me, hear the things that I say. 

fight for me. 

FIGHT FOR ME 

I heart your heart .