At a loss

 I am at a loss I am losing Vincent.  Since my mother died, he has gotten further and further away.  He won't let me help him with anything.  He doesn't talk to me and when he does like it's this half mumbling with his mouth closed.  I am pretty sure that he is doing things that he should not.  I have only smelled it in his room once, but there are the candles and the incense being used to cover the smell. The other night I was awakened by that smell, and I was frozen in my bed.  It would have been a fight. I also walked into his room and his binds were pulled up, I am sure to open the window.  There is the extreme moodiness.  He has even started punching walls.  I catch him in these little lies.... all the time that just don't make sense. He says one thing and does another.  He makes these trips up the street.  He has done it a few times now; does he think I don't notice?  He goes down the street and comes back maybe 15 minutes later.  He is sneaky and I am struggling to trust him right now. He goes to random places, makes random trips and it doesn't look good for him.  I want to believe in him and trust him, but right now I can't.  Tonight, he said he was going to the gym, he was at the park in Anna a very dark park at 11 at night.  No that doesn't make sense.  So many things are not adding up and I am scared for him.  It almost pains him to even have to look at me.  Every question I ask either I don't get a response or get an angered one.  I am afraid for him; I fear that he is taking a wrong turn.  He has completely shut me out.  Even buying groceries for him.  He won't even let me do that.  I even asked him tonight, I said let me know what you need, and I can get it.  He said I don't need anything from you.  Today I saw that he needed milk. I got him some.  I got a shrug of the shoulders. No thank you, no nothing.   I am the enemy, and I don't understand.  I keep reaching out, keep trying and it is hard he is so hurtful and disrespectful. I don't know what is next.  I love him so much and he won't let me care for him.  I feel like things are getting worse and worse.  I wonder when the boiling point is, and when rock bottom will happen.  I keep trying I am his mom, but I am spent. He hates me, he hates everything I stand for. It is more than hurtful.  People say he will come around, and with all that I am I hope that is true. 

I heart your heart.