Friday, November 10, 2023

Always the inbetween

 So I have been crying all afternoon and the tears just won't stop, and its after 9. I literally can't get them to stop. I shouldn't have given Mark a hug when I left this afternoon, because I didn't want to let go and then I just stood there and the tears came like a flood. They came hard and fast and I can tell you that is the most alone place in the world. When there is that much sadness and pain inside and there is no soft place to go.  That is the worst feeling and now I can't shake it.  I feel like I am stuck between two places in every area of my life and I hate it.  

I have one foot in the door at school, and the other so out.  I am stuck between the past and the present.  I am healing moving forward yet can't leave spunky.  My children are young adults and stuck in-between being a kid and an adult.  I am stuck in all three places and belonging nowhere.  Again a terrible place to be.  I don't feel like i even know which direction is up anymore.  

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